Title of the Thread
Brief (hopefully) introductory sentence preparing reader for gist of post. Continuation of opening paragraph intended to bring reader to brink of correctly anticipating thesis about to ensue.
Claim or thesis statement often incorporating and generally boiling down to the title of the thread.
Brief digression expressing humility while actually designed to gain sympathy and hopefully support of reader (IMHO).
Beginning of anecdotal evidence in support of thesis often including, but not requiring, additional seemingly reasonable but factually unsupported speculations designed to lend further credence to the title of the thread. Tangential speculations that add nothing to the argument but which potentially spawn quoted rebuttals. Statement of supporting stats to follow.
Cherry picked stats which, upon closer examination, sometimes actually prove title of the thread to be incorrect.
Appeal to alleged authority, whose qualifications are often completely irrelevant, in attempt to further bolster legitimacy of the title of the thread followed by general call to readers for comments and possible alternative positions.
Hopefully clever username designed to invoke admiration of reader and perhaps even a little envy.